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VII. The Magic Wand - Introduction: Choosing Happiness
Happiness is not having what you want, but wanting what you have."
- Rabbi H. Schachtel , The Real Enjoyment of Living

As a tarot reader, I find that many of my clients come to me looking for a "magic wand". They want me to lay down the cards and tell them that all their dreams and hopes are going to come true; that they will be happy ever after. They want me to tell them their lives will be fulfilled and that everything will be OK. The truth is that it is always OK no matter what comes.

However, that is not what they want to hear, they want to hear that what they want is what is going to appear. On top of that, they want it to appear magically without them having to do anything to make it happen. That's what I mean by they are looking to me to wave my magic wand over them and then they will be fixed, happy, and fulfilled.

Knowing I can't "fix" anyone but myself, I have however allowed myself to contemplate what I can possibly do. What can I give my clients? Is there a magic wand? Is there something that I can share that will allow others to create a happy and fulfilled life?

What I came to was that I truly know in my heart that there is a magic wand, and it is within each of you. I don't have it for you and you don't have it for me. We each have it within yourselves and in order to access it we must do the work to open to it. Once you access it, you can allow it to assist you in creating a happy and fulfilled life.

I have decided to commit to you that I will write a bimonthly newsletter that will share the methods I have used in accessing the magic wand within myself and my clients. I will share my own and my clients experiences as we have come to the place of happiness and fulfillment. Also included will be exercises that will assist you to access this magic wand. This newsletter is the beginning of writing down the process you can use to come to this happiness yourself. It is an introduction to the process to access your very own magic wand. Twice a month I will include another chapter or "step" that will allow you, if you choose to do the exercises, to create a happier and more fulfilling life for yourself.

Choosing Happiness

And speaking of choosing, that's where it all starts - with choices. The first choice you must make is to choose to be happy. Think about what that means, do you really want to be happy and fulfilled? We all know someone who has had opportunities to change their situation in ways that we could see would bring them greater happiness. However when it came right down to it, they choose to stay in their unhappy lives. Maybe their fear of the unknown was greater than their need to be happy. Maybe their comfort zone is in the unhappiness.

On the other hand you must love what you have, where you are and even who you are in order to be happy. That doesn't mean you can't bring more into your lives, or release that which is not serving you or grow into an even better person. However it does mean choosing to be happy right now in this moment with your current circumstances. Why do we feel that if we are happy with what is, that we will not do anything to grow or change? Change is always going to happen in this world and as we make choices around that change we grow. So right this moment if you are to access this magic wand, you must choose to be happy.

In order to explore your commitment to taking this new journey in your life, you need to determine if you want to be happy and more fulfilled. To do that you can use the following exercise to determine if you are ready to make the commitment to being happy and fulfilled.

First, pick a time when you will have at least an hour of quiet, turn off all outside stimuli including all phones, and find a comfortable, quiet spot where you will not be disturbed. Now take out a piece of paper or your journal. Start by taking three deep breaths in the following manner: 1) inhale through your nose for a count of 8 bringing your breath all the way to your belly, 2) hold the breath for a count of 4 and 3) exhale through your mouth for another count of 8. This will relax you and bring you to the present moment.

Starting with question 1 below; read the question, close your eyes and allow the answer to come to you. When you have received the answer, write it down before going on to the next question.

  • What are the situations or circumstances in your life that you would like to change or release?
  • For each of the above situations or circumstances, write down the fears that keep you from changing or releasing them.
  • What would your life look like if you lived each day as if it was your last? Where would your priorities be? What would you do, who would you be with? Picture your ideal day and write about it.
  • What would a day in your life look like if you choose happiness every moment of that day? If you didn't have to be right or better than, just happy?
  • Are you ready to choose to be happy and fulfilled? If not, what is stopping you?

If so, write "Just for today I choose to be happy" on a 3X5 card. Place the card next to your bed and each morning for the next three weeks before you get out of bed, read the card and acknowledge to yourself that today you are choosing to be happy. You might find it helpful to put cards stating this on your bathroom mirror, your kitchen cabinets or refrigerator and even around your work surface. These will remind you that you are choosing to be happy during your day.

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